A Little Pickle Will Not Do Ya

Editor’s Note: These chips seem to be the successor to the Lay’s Fried Pickle and Ranch chips that were a limited edition flavor for a while. We’re not sure if they’re exactly the same or not, as we didn’t sample those chips, but presumably they were enough of a hit for Lay’s to keep them around… despite the fact that they’re not that great. Read on for details:

I’m not gonna be a monster and try to argue against potato chips. They’re fun. They’re tasty. Everyone likes them. I will note, however, that the basic potato chip was meant to be a vessel for dip. Simple, salty flavor that can only enhance a thick and creamy dip when combined. The plain potato chip is snackable on its own but made even better with dip, such that the whole concept of “chips and dip” is ingrained in our collective consciousness. If you have chips you want dip or, at the very least, the flavor conveyed by dips sprinkled onto the chips.

Flavored chips are great. I enjoy a spicy bbq chip, a tasty sour cream and onion, a buttery cheddar and sour cream, and a number of other flavors. Ranch is a great flavor of potato chip, having that creaminess of the sour cream flavors along with the zing of the ranch seasoning. And hell, dill pickle flavored chips are good too, combining the acidic bite of vinegar with the tangy dill of the pickle flavor. It’s hard to go wrong with a well made, well seasoned chip… and yet somehow Lay’s managed it.

One of their newest flavors, the Lay’s Roaring Ranch ∓ Fried Pickle flavored chips, is actually the worst of both worlds somehow. You would expect, from the package, that it would be a combination of the best flavors of each topping. Heck, dill is in both pickles and ranch so, naturally, the flavors should go together. But somehow, in combining the two flavors together, Lay’s has made a chip that is neither luxuriously creamy from the ranch nor sharp and snappy from the pickle. It’s muted, sad, and actually very boring. It’s a bad chip.

From a basic chip standpoint these Lay’s are fine. I’m not the biggest fan of Lay’s chips when compared to, say, kettle cooked varietals or even Wavy Lays. I like a bit more crunch and snap for my chips, some substance to them, and I find Lay’s to be too thin, maybe a little soggy even from all the grease on them. They aren’t the absolute worst chip I’ve ever eaten, which was both greasy and burned (and also homemade, in fairness), but they certainly rank lower than many other chips on the market today. So, yes, this variety of chip had to get past that basic issue already.

But when it comes to flavor, the chips really fall flat. The chips taste neither like ranch or pickle, finding a muted middle ground that speaks to neither. Reading the label you see, up front, “Roaring Ranch”. So, first and foremost these should be ranch chips, yes? Bold ranch seasoning on the chip that gives you that creamy zing when you snack on it. But the chips lack creaminess to the flavor. The ranch is barely noticeable at all, without a hint of classic buttermilk, dill, or salt. Whatever roar is supposed to be on this Roaring Ranch is lacking on these chips.

Worse, though, is that the dill is lacking so that specific pickle flavor is also missing. I’m not sure what would make a chip have a “Fried Pickle” flavor, outside the fact that Lay’s chips are fried in oil and maybe the grease was meant to convey that fried quality. Certainly, though, it lacks even the basic flavor of a pickle in any form. The vinegar flavor is muted, dulled, without a snap or bit and certainly without that dill. Fried pickles do taste somewhat different from fresh ones, yes, but they still clearly taste of pickle through and through and these chips do not.

Somehow in combining these flavors, the creamy and the vinegary, the contrast of tastes counteracted each other. Instead of the two flavors coming together to create something exceptionally great, two great tastes that taste great together (as the saying goes), they instead wipe each other away, leaving you with a chip that tastes like it has barely any flavor at all. Neither ranch nor pickle, and certainly not “roaring” nor “fried” either. It’s just bland and very, very dull.

Worse, the lack of flavor actually makes these chips taste even worse than a standard Lay’s. At least those basic potato chips have salt to them. These chips don’t even taste very salty, just sad. In trying to make a truly roaring experience, Lay’s somehow made the antithesis of all that is good and right in the snack aisle. They made a sucking void of flavorlessness, from which no good chip can escape.

In other words, don’t buy these. They suck. Ranch chips are great, and both Ruffles and Wavy Lays have had good versions in the past. Dill Pickle chips are also great, and the Lay’s version are pretty good (and regularly stocked in stores). But together, these flavors are awful and you should avoid them at all costs. Some things, Lay’s, should just not be combined.