Adventures Beyond the Mushroom Kingdom

With the success of The Super Mario Bros. Movie (raking in over $1.3 Bil at the Box Office, not to mention home video sales, toys, and more), and that's on top of the relative successful Detective Pikachu movie from 2019, NintendoSince 1983 (with the release of the Famicom gaming system in Japan), Nintendo has proven to be a gaming company dedicated to finding what gamers want, even when the gamers don't know it themselves. From dual-screen systems, to motion controls, to convertible home console/portable consoles, Nintendo regularly proves that the weirdest innovation is exactly what the gaming community needs. has finally broken into movie theaters (the less said about the 1993 Super Mario Bros. film, the better). Naturally, Big N has decided to go full steam ahead, putting into production more films. The first announced was a Legend of Zelda film, which Nintendo going to produce with, of all companies, Sony. And once that does well, we're likely on the cusp of Nintendo putting every franchise they have onto movie screens. And they have a lot of franchises.

Seeing as they have so many, we thought it would be fun to look at some of the other Nintendo franchises and see just what kinds of movies we could devise. Here is our (entirely stupid and funny) list of upcoming movies Nintendo absolutely should make:

1080° Snowboarding

While we could just do a movie about snowboarders looking to grind that next snowbank or whatever (we're not snowboarders), instead, let's really give the movie some true action and story. Working in the vein of xXx we have the ultimate extreme action spy movie. Agent 1080 is young, skilled, and ready to stop any terrorist threat against the world. He's called it to take on the nasty foes of AVALANCHE, and when they threaten to blow up a snowboarding competition in Switzerland, there's only one agent that can get the job done.

Animal Crossing

A new guy moves into a town full of anthropomorphic animals. It's an idyllic town, full of nice people (except for that Tom Nook, always overcharging everyone for everything). But when a body turns up dead, everyone starts pointing their fingers (and their paws) at all the likely suspects. Only the new guy in town, who worked as a consulting detective in his former life, can put the pieces together and find the real killer. It's all a deep conspiracy that keeps getting more elaborate the more he digs. Murder, intrigue, black market bells. It's all related, and there's danger around every corner. The sweet animal town is full of dirty secrets, and by the end of the case it will all come out.

Balloon Fight

War is hell, especially for the men of the Airborne Balloon Brigade. When the birdmen invade, it'll take this elite squadron to fight them back and save the country. But Red, a maverick balloon fighter with a chip on his shoulder, just can't be part of the squad, he has to be the best, risking his life, and the lives of his team, to show his stuff. A hard fall, and a nasty splash into reality, might just be the only thing that can ground this balloon fighter and help his realize his potential... and he might be the only one that can save the world.

Earthbound

Frankly, I don't even think we need to be goofy about this one. The Mother / Earthbound games are beloved by fans, even if they aren't the most well known outside of Nintendo fans. After Super Mario SeriesHe's the world's most famous plumber and the biggest face in Nintendo's stable, a character so ubiquitous you already knew we were talking about Mario even before we said his name., Legend of ZeldaCreated by Nintendo in 1986, the original Legend of Zelda game presented players with a open world to explore, packed with dungeons and monsters all ready to kill them at a moment's notice. The mix of adventure and action game play created a winning game and launched not only a successful series but an entirely new video game genre., and then likely Metroid (which well get to in a bit), I would expect Earthbound to get its due, in some form. What form would that be?

Well, unlike many of the games on this list, which are largely plot-less, the Earthbound games, which are all RPGs, have plenty of plot to draw from. I would think, in all seriousness, that we'd get an adaptation of the story of Earthbound (aka, Mother 2) as that's the one everyone on this side of the pond knows. Ness and his friends venture out and end up on a wild quest against scientists, aliens, and more. Could work as a movie, or an anime series. But this is a series that deserves to get its due, and then, just maybe, Nintendo will make a fourth game afterwards...

F-Zero

A young up-and-coming street hustler finds his entirely turned upside down when he gets sucked into the world of high speed jet-car racing. Taken under the wing of one Captain Falcon, this new racer has to find the strength within to overcome the opposition, and his own demons, to prove he could be the best racer the high speed tracks have ever seen. But will his past on the streets of Mute City come back to end his career? Ow will be master the King League and win the cup? Can he prove to Captain Falcon, and himself, that he's the best?

Honestly, how else would you do an F-Zero movie? There isn't much (or any) plot in these games, so what you're looking at would be stitching a story onto the setting. I think something in the vein of Days of Thunder, just in the world of F-Zero is your best bet. New character, new story, high speed power.

Metroid

Here's another game series where I think we have to admit that we really want honest adaptations of the source material. Samus is called in by the Galactic Federation because the Space Pirates have discovered the Metroids, a species of life force-stealing creatures, and if the pirates can engineer these creatures into true weapons no one would be safe. That the first game, and it could be the first movie as well. You'd just need to do a bit of massaging as the first game is, well, incredible plot light. Hell, most of them are until Metroid Fusion.

As such, while I think the goal is to spend 45 minutes or so with Samus, making her way through the caverns of Zebes, defeating monsters while horrors come from every corner, you have to start with the story. Maybe have a colony of humans on another planet getting attacked by the Pirates. Say a single Metroid is unleashed to test its power. The Federation catches wind, sends in the Marines to Zebes to clear the planet... and then the entire platoon is wiped out. If the best of the best can't do it, who can? Perhaps the bounty hunter with ties to Zebes, and her own set of gear that gives her an edge...

Picross

Professor Peter Picross is a genius when it comes to the arts, but in his relationships he's a complete novice. When he loses his wife to a freak, grid-based accident, Picross finds himself searching the darkest archives to find a way to bring her back. But as he puts the pieces together, and reveals the secrets of the universe tile by tile, he might just uncover eldritch secrets he wasn't prepared for. It's a battle against the damned for the fate of his wife's soul, all played out on a grid of 20 by 20 tiles.

Punch-Out!!

Little Mac wants to be the best, but to get there he's gotta get his break. No one will face him in the ring, he being shorter and scrawnier than every other fighter around. But when he gets a fateful meeting with washed-up coach Doc Louis, Mac might just find the edge he needs to get in the ring and take them all one. One win after another comes ones the fights begin, but does Mac have what it takes to battle the likes of Piston Honda, Bald Bull, the Sandman, and Mr. Dream. If he loses he's punched back down the league. Only a truly great fight can win him the title, and the glory, he knows he deserves.