Writer's Workshop

This chapter is very much a turning point for the series. We're halfway in and I felt like some big twists were need. I won't spoil them here since, well, the script is right below, but this halfway mark really does spell the next phase for the story. Big things are coming.

Before you dive in make sure you're all caught up on the story up until now (in the script archive) before diving into this chapter.

Bride of Dracula: Part 7

EXT: PARIS STREETS, NIGHT, PRESENT.

LUCY emerges from a dark alley, dressed in he same outfit we saw her in before (so we know this is the same night), and she heads out into the now darkening city. Light slowly come on around her as various people mill about, doing their evening shopping. As LUCY moves down the street we see GUILLAUME comes out from a different alley, keeping an eye on the vampiress. He moves along the street slowly, staying at least a block behind her while clearly keeping her in his sights.

Eventually she moves down a different alley and disappears into the night. GUILLAUME pauses and waits and when she doesn't emerge soon after, he moves closer to investigate.

EXT: PARIS ALLEY, NIGHT, PRESENT.

GUILLAUME moves into the alley and looks around. It doesn't connect through but leads to a dead end, and he doesn't spy any door or other regular entrance into the alley. He does, however, see access grates into the tunnels below. He taps one with his foot, thinking. Then he backs off, out of the alley.

EXT: RITZ PARIS, NIGHT, PRESENT.

We see LUCY, now dressed in a new outfit, move her way up to the hotel before entering.

INT: RITZ PARIS, FOURTH FLOOR, NIGHT, PRESENT.

LUCY moves down the upper hall before ending up at room 412. She knocks, and RACHEL answers, surprised to see LUCY there. The girl is dressed, but not in her usual finery, clearly working on getting ready for the evening.

RACHEL:

LUCIA, I wasn't expecting you.

LUCY:

I wanted to take you up on the offer of a meal. It was rather rude of me, brushing you off like that before.

RACHEL:

You have nothing to worry about. I wasn't offended.

Then she pauses.

RACHEL:

But how did you know my brother and I were staying here?

LUCY takes off her gloves and puts her hand to RACHEL's face.

LUCY:

Because you told me.

RACHEL nods.

RACHEL:

Yes, of course. I did.

LUCY removes her hand.

LUCY:

Invite me in. No need to draw eyes out in the hall.

RACHEL nods and steps aside.

RACHEL:

Please, come in.

LUCY bustles in and RACHEL closes the door.

INT: ROOM 412, RITZ HOTEL, NIGHT, PRESENT.

RACHEL sits down in one of the comfortable chairs around the suite. LUCY finds another to match and sets herself primly on it.

LUCY:

Your brother isn't here?

RACHEL:

He has the room next door. But I don't know if he's around or not. He runs errands during the day, gets up long before I do.

LUCY:

So it's just us girls, then.

RACHEL smiles and nods.

LUCY:

Excellent. Well, you should get ready and then we can go out for food. I'm sure you're hungry.

RACHEL:

Oh yes. I was waiting for BARRETT to say he was ready to head out, but with you here, I suppose we can go somewhere together.

LUCY:

That would be lovely.

RACHEL smiles then stands.

RACHEL:

I just need a few moments.

She heads to the back part of the suite, where her bedroom resides, turns on a light and starts gathering her outfit. She leaves the doors open, and as she brings out a dress we watch as she unzips the more casual dress she was wearing, letting it slide off to reveal her undergarments. We catch a slightly look over her shoulder as she does this, as if to check if LUCY is watching.

CLOSE UP: LUCY.

LUCY is, and she gets somewhat uncomfortable, a bit of a blush climbing on her very pale skin. We see her grip the arm of the couch, taking a breath.

WIDE SHOT: BEDROOM.

RACHEL smiles slightly and her hands move her her top, pulling the chemise up, revealing her naked back to the room. As she brings it up, over her head-

CLOSE UP: LUCY.

LUCY breathes again, her mouth slightly parted, a hint of long fang revealed.

CLOSE UP: RACHEL.

RACHEL lets the garment fall to the floor and her hand has LUCY's alongside it, LUCY already magically there. We follow the arm up as LUCY spins the girl around, until we're focused on the two of them, face to face.

PAN OUT TO TWO SHOT.

LUCY has her arms around RACHEL's upper body while RACHEL's hands are crossed on her chest. She smiles to LUCY, lets her hands drift down, pushing her shift off so she stands there naked.

RACHEL:

I wondered if you'd join me.

LUCY looks away.

LUCY:

I really shouldn't-

RACHEL:

I'm not afraid.

LUCY looks at her.

LUCY:

You don't understand. I mean... this is... it's improper.

RACHEL:

Not for me it isn't.

She brings her hands up to LUCY's face and leans in to kiss her.

LUCY:

You don't know what I could do.

RACHEL:

I've known since I met you, LUCY.

LUCY's eyes go wide.

LUCY:

What? How?

RACHEL leans her head to the side, inviting a bite on her neck.

RACHEL:

BARRETT and I both knew. He has the family's journals, he just doesn't know I read them.

LUCY steps back.

LUCY:

So you're here to find me.

RACHEL sighs.

RACHEL:

Yes, but not how you think. Well, BARRETT is exactly how you think, but I just wanted to meet you.

LUCY looks angry.

LUCY:

I swore once I wasn't going to make anyone into a vampire. I still refuse.

RACHEL nods and then saunters closer.

RACHEL:

I don't want to be a vampire.

She steps closer still.

RACHEL:

I just want you.

She's once again face to face with LUCY.

LUCY:

But your brother said you were here to find a husband.

RACHEL:

He can think what he wants.

RACHEL's hands go to the front of LUCY's dress, unlacing the top.

LUCY:

And your brother wants my blood.

RACHEL:

He can't have it.

She helps LUCY out of her corset top, then starts working on the buttons of the dress beneath.

LUCY:

We can't. I mean, we mustn't. I could hurt you.

RACHEL smiles.

RACHEL:

I trust you.

RACHEL pushes LUCY's dress off her shoulders, leaving her in her undergarments.

LUCY:

I haven't... I mean, this would be...

RACHEL gives a sly smile.

RACHEL:

You've been alive 50 years and never before have you done this?

LUCY shakes her head, visibly pale.

RACHEL:

Well there will be new experiences for us both, then.

She grab's LUCY's hands and drags her back into the bedroom. The lights click off.

EXT: ROMANI CAMP, BOROGRAVIAN WOODS, NIGHT.

LUCY and NICA come back into the camp from their hunting trip earlier. They're talking to themselves, with LUCY even letting out a laugh, obviously becoming friendly with each other. RENFIELD watches them from across the camp, looking quite displeased. As the two women part ways, RENFIELD stands and moves over to LUCY.

TWO SHOT: RENFIELD AND LUCY.

RENFIELD moves up and stops her from going back to her wagon.

RENFIELD:

You need to be careful.

LUCY:

I am careful. I know how to hunt on my own.

RENFIELD:

I mean with that woman.

LUCY:

NICA? She proved very useful on the hunt.

RENFIELD:

(louder) I'm not talking about hunting.

The camp grows quieter, and RENFIELD looks around.

RENFIELD:

(quieter) You need to think about propriety.

LUCY gives him a look.

LUCY:

What do you think happened out in the woods?

RENFIELD:

I know what you almost did with that bar wench. Remember, that's what forced us here.

LUCY looks quite angry.

LUCY:

I do not need to be reminded of my actions. And I don't need you to tell me what to do.

RENFIELD:

I think you do. I do not want to be killed by the very people protecting us.

LUCY glares at him.

LUCY:

I have no plans to kill anyone here.

RENFIELD:

And you shouldn't do... other things, either.

LUCY coughs.

LUCY:

Pardon me?

RENFIELD:

Those kinds of things are not done by a lady.

LUCY:

I'm sure I don't know what you mean.

RENFIELD:

You do, and you will promise you will stop yourself from doing any of... that.

LUCY looks at him, darkly.

LUCY:

I will do as I see fit, RENFIELD.

RENFIELD:

I forbid it.

LUCY gets in his face.

LUCY:

Must I remind you, one of us is a vampire and the other is just a human.

RENFIELD:

(quieter still) Which makes you far more vulnerable during the day than myself.

He looks out at the people watching them.

RENFIELD:

Think about that.

Then he turns and walks away.

FADE TO BLACK.

INT: BEDROOM, ROOM 412, RITZ HOTEL, NIGHT, PRESENT.

We find LUCY and RACHEL curled up in bed together, entwined, the bed in a state of disarray, sheets tangled around their bodies. There is blood on the sheets, and on both of them, along with a visible bite on RACHEL's upper thigh. Both ladies, though, are quiet alive. RACHEL giggles.

RACHEL:

Well, that was something.

LUCY smiles, but there's darkness in her eyes.

RACHEL:

What is it?

LUCY:

I could have killed you.

RACHEL kisses her.

RACHEL:

I knew you wouldn't.

LUCY:

How, though? How do you know this of me?

RACHEL:

I've read about you, all the notes from my grandfather.

LUCY:

RENFIELD.

RACHEL:

We're all Renfields. But yes, R.M. RENFIELD. He wrote down everything you two experienced, and those journals have been passed through the family.

LUCY:

To you and BARRETT.

RACHEL shakes her head.

RACHEL:

Just BARRETT. I wasn't supposed to read them. “That's not material suitable for a lady.” Only made me want to read the journals more.

LUCY:

So you two came here to find me.

RACHEL:

I didn't realize it at the time. I did find it odd hat BARRETT wanted to go to France as war was brewing on the continent, but he told me the same story he fed you.

LUCY:

You were here to find a husband.

RACHEL nodded.

LUCY:

So he doesn't know that you-

RACHEL:

Had no interest in any of that. Absolutely not. I know how to keep a secret.

LUCY:

Many secrets.

RACHEL:

Indeed. However, when I saw you, and you matched the descriptions and drawings from the journals. I just knew.

LUCY:

You wanted to meet me, you said.

RACHEL:

Up until that night, yes. And then I was in love with you.

LUCY blushes, then grows sad.

LUCY:

This won't last.

RACHEL:

Because I'm human.

LUCY nods.

LUCY:

And I won't turn you.

RACHEL:

I wouldn't ask. But we have to watch out for BARRETT.

LUCY leans up on her elbows.

LUCY:

You think he-

SFX: Door knocking.

BARRETT (OFF CAMERA):

RACHEL? Are you in?

RACHEL:

Merde.

LUCY looks over at the door.

RACHEL:

You need to-

LUCY turns off the light nearest her and then vanishes from sight.

RACHEL:

-hide.

RACHEL gets up and shouts at the door.

RACHEL:

Just a second!

She quickly throws the blankets over the bed to hide the mess, then grabs a robe. She spots herself in a mirror, splashes some water around her neck and face to scrub off a bit of the blood, then throws on the robe and moves across the suite.

INT: RITZ PARIS, FOURTH FLOOR, NIGHT, PRESENT.

BARRETT raises his hand to knock on room 412's door again, but RACHEL pulls it open. BARRETT looks her over.

BARRETT:

You look flushed.

RACHEL:

I was in the bathroom, getting ready, and had to run across the suit to answer the door.

BARRETT nods.

BARRETT:

We should discuss tonight.

He starts to push his way into the room, but she stops him.

RACHEL:

Brother, I'm not dressed. I will need a few minutes.

BARRETT pauses, looking past his sister into the room, then nods.

BARRETT:

I will meet you downstairs, then. Be quick about it.

RACHEL smiles, but doesn't agree, and closes the door.

INT: BEDROOM, ROOM 412, RITZ HOTEL, NIGHT, PRESENT.

RACHEL turns from the door and LUCY comes back into human form from out of the shadows, right behind her.

LUCY:

I should go.

RACHEL:

That would be proper.

LUCY nods, then turns, but RACHEL grabs her hand.

RACHEL:

But I do also have a huge, claw-foot tub in the room, and the water here gets exceptionally hot.

She unties her robe and lets it fall to the floor. LUCY smiles and takes her hand, and they both head back deeper into the suite.

FADE OUT.

End of Part 7:

My, there was a fair bit of sex there. In fact, this entire chapter was basically all about sex, but it was necessary. It was time for the relationship between Lucy and Rachel to change. Necessary. If we're going to move into the back half and have the characters where I envision them, then this whole chapter here was required. It could have happened here, or later, but too much later and everything here feels like it would have been dulled somehow. We now get new character dynamics for the whole back half, and that's great.

When I originally had this script in mind, and really only had the first couple of scenes envisioned, I didn't have Rachel and Lucy as a couple. But as I introduced the characters, and bounced them off each other, I felt chemistry between them. This pairing felt natural, and it helped to define Lucy's own sexuality before, during, and after. Rachel helped Lucy come into view better for me, and that led to a lot of her own character traits and quirks. I love it when this kind of thing happens.

And I think the sex here is needed. That's not just because vampires are both scary and sexy so you need both sides of the monster to be represented. I also needed to use it to illustrate a few things. For one, I wanted to show the romance between Rachel and Lucy and just not have it be coyly hinted at. Making Rachel into the aggressor in the process also flips the script on the vampire, having the monster come to the room but the girl in the skimpy outfit be the one to attack. And also, the sex we saw in the first script, Dracula, was with monsters being monstrous. There was nothing monstrous here, which show how different Lucy is from the vampire that created her.

With that said, I could see this chapter changing a bit whenever I go through a do a big editing pass, only because I can feel some creakiness in t he dialogue. It's not bad, but I already feel like I could smooth it out. I just need to let it sit for a few weeks or months before I, or someone else, goes through to edit. But that's s different stage of this project from just getting it written.