The Kangaroo Says...

Recently my wife and I went to the Virginia Safari Park, a zoo and safari ride attraction set in the western part of the state. It's not a bad little zoo, although considering its price ($30 a person, plus more if you want to pay to feed the animals, or take guided wagon rides around the safari section of the park instead of driving yourself) it's not exactly a great value. Especially not when you consider the National Zoo, two and a half hours away in D.C., is free. We didn't mind seeing the animals but it absolutely wasn't worth the cash outlay.

Still, since we were there we took a lot of photos of the animals. Here's what we say, with absolutely toally real, not made up at all, scientific names:

Teacup Goats (Toats Not Guaranteed, Offer Void in Utah)
Unleavened Bird Loaf

He would like to speak to your manager
Aerodynamic Ant-acidal Maniac

Judge, Jury, and Executioners
"Paint me like one of your Australian girls"

Cocktail Cockatiel
Murder in Monotone, Oil on Canvas, 1986.

Galapagos Chocolate Tort
African Just So Over It

Patterned Murder Horse
Teacup Deer

Ancient Feathered Dinosaur (Abridged), Volume 1
Ancient Feathered Dinosaur (Abridged), Volume 2

Wild Untamed Coatrack
Teacup Buffalo

Domesticated Tamed Coatrack
Bob

Savanna Corkscrew
Mr. Piggums, Esq.